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B’nai Mitzvah @ Rodef Shalom

B’nai Mitzvah Program & Process

We see each child as an individual and know that no family has the same set of circumstances. If you are interested in our B'nai Mitzvah program please contact Rabbi Carrie to discuss your family's needs and more details of the program. 



Pre-B'nai Mitzvah Slides


Dates to Remember


Date Choice Form

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B’nai Mitzvah Program & Process

Educational Expectations and Choices

  • Two years enrolled in R School or Day School and Shabbat Morning Programs
  • Tutoring
  • Hebrew/Prayer/Torah/Haftarah –there are various options
  • 7th grade B'nai program – R•Mitzvah 
    • Meets twice monthly Shabbat
    • Family Programs
    • Monthly Sessions with Rabbi Kobrin

Important Dates


  • Attend the B’nai Mitzvah Family Orientation (March)  
  • Date Confirmation and Parsha assignment  
  • You will have one year to pay the $500 B’nai mitzvah fee after confirming your date  

One Year Prior to B’nai Mitzvah 

  • Family meeting with Rabbi Kobrin  
  • Begin attending monthly Saturday Shabbat Schmooze with Rabbi Kobrin 
  • Join Family Programming Sessions (school year program) 
  • Take Student Hebrew Assessment to determine tutoring needs 

Nine Months Prior to B’nai Mitzvah 

  • Begin working with B’nai Mitzvah Tutor on Haftarah and Torah 
  • Please see the list of recommended private tutors 
  • Research and choose Mitzvah Project 

Three Months Prior to B’nai Mitzvah 

  • Set meetings with Rabbi Kobrin to explore and develop your D’var Torah 

The Last Few WEEKS Prior to B'nai Mitzvah

  • Three weeks before: send Sean ( Mitzvah child’s questionnaire and photo for enews and a list of requested aliyot* (honors assigned for Services) 
    *Families must keep three aliyot open for the community 
  • Schedule rehearsal in sanctuary with Rabbi Kobrin 
  • One week in advance, submit guest list and final attendance numbers 

Download Important Date Checklist


How to Pick a Date

Dates that are NOT an option - Selichot through Bereshit

Boys must be 13 years old by their Hebrew birthdate on or before the date of the Bar Mitzvah service

Girls must be 12 years old by their Hebrew birthdate on or before the date of the Bat Mitzvah service

Nonbinary/transgender  - If you feel that your child is mature enough to be prepared by age 12 then choose 12 or 13. The above halacha is based on the Talmudic idea that girls reached physical maturity earlier than boys.

Use this link to help you choose a date: HebCal 

Click here to choose your date. (Form closes Friday, April 14, 2023)


B'nai Mitzvah Planning & Questions

Amy Berkowitz Caplan, Executive Director

Sean Sanford,  Clergy and Executive Director Assistant 

Rabbi Carrie Benveniste, Director of Congregational Learning

Rabbi Rachel Kobrin, Spiritual Leader

We strive to make the B’nai Mitzvah experience great for every family. If you have a special circumstance, need accommodations regarding schedule or financial commitments, have specific individual needs. Please reach out to Rabbi Carrie or Rabbi Kobrin. We are available to help and support you in every step of the journey from today through B’Nai Mitzvah and beyond.  

Wed, May 31 2023 11 Sivan 5783